A waterlily blooms at Denver Botanic Gardens

When I was reviewing Christian McEwen’s book about re-imagining life to allow time and space for creativity to flourish, World Enough & Time, I flagged a passage where she quotes Twyla Tharp: “‘If you are generous to someone, you are in effect making him [or her] lucky. … It is like inviting yourself into a community of good fortune.’”

McEwen adds:

In other words, generosity is generative (they come in fact, from the same root, the Latin genere: ‘to engender, or be born’). Kindness is itself a creative act.

Generosity is generative; kindness is a creative act. Like the ring of ripples resulting from a pebble dropped into a still pool, with lovingkindness, the community of good fortune spreads outward.

The waning crescent moon aims at Venus, the planet of love, as they draw apart on their celestial journeys.

One of many things my late husband Richard and I talked about in his last months was how to make sure our ordinary every days reflected the great love we shared. Living with our hearts “outstretched as if they were our hands,” (a line from a Mary Chapin Carpenter song) was key to that, we agreed.

“You taught me to be generous,” he said. “I am grateful for that gift.”

“You were already generous,” I responded. “I just helped you find and exercise your natural generosity.”

Kindness as a creative act was illustrated in an email I received the other day from friends who we had reconnected with during Richard’s journey with brain cancer. Nancy and Richard had worked together decades ago in Boulder, and then lost touch.

When Nancy and Dave, a plein air painter, learned Richard had brain cancer, they were tremendously supportive. Among other things, after touring Richard’s studio and rock yard they commissioned him to sculpt a water feature for their front garden.

Richard played with ideas. But by the time he had figured out the sculpture, a jagged flagstone slab that rose out of a granite base the way the Flatirons rise out of the Front Range above Boulder, his tumor had essentially destroyed his right brain.

The “upraised arms” rock, a piece of gneiss with a distinct fold. (My sandal is for scale.)

He could explain the design, but could no longer sculpt. He did however, show me the boulders he would use, including the “upraised arms” rock, a piece of beautifully figured pink and gray gneiss with sparkly mica flecks.

“The fold reminds me of when you’re happy,” I said, “and you throw your hands upward, raising your arms high.”

He smiled, leaning on his cane. “That’s Buddha’s rock.”

I was puzzled.

“Their Buddha sculpture needs a seat to go with the water feature,” he said. “The upraised arms rock will hold him.”

I forgot about that rock in the intensity of the last months of Richard’s life, and in figuring out my new solo existence. Late this summer though, I was moving boulders in Richard’s rock yard, and uncovered it.

I emailed Nancy and Dave to ask if they wanted the rock as a “seat” for Buddha. Did they ever! As luck would have it, they were coming to Salida, so we arranged to have brunch and load up the rock.

Which proved to be a challenge, since it weighs around 100 pounds. But Dave had a tarp to use as a sled; we found a piece of lumber for a ramp, and tugged and hauled it into their Jeep.

Buddha on the “upraised arms” rock. (Photo by Dave Mayer)

One a fine day this week, Dave found time to set the rock in their courtyard garden. And emailed me this story with a photo of Buddha on his new seat:

Cleared a space, dug the hole, measured, dug some more, tweaked, and rotated the stone to drop in place. Duh! I had it in backwards, rotated one turn too many! (So much for an artist’s spatial recognition talents.)

I thought, “This is way too heavy to lift out of the hole again.” As I struggled, I said silently, “Richard, help me get this rock back out!”

Just like that, out it came. WOW! Now it’s back in … with the uplifting grain the correct way.

Generosity is generative, kindness a creative act, connecting us in a community of good fortune. You, me, Richard’s spirit, Nancy and Dave, the Buddha on his upraised arms rock. All it takes is living our days with love outermost, arms upraised, open to joy….

Rmatriculation

If I've been quiet lately, it's because I'm up to my ears with projects out of my comfort zone. I'm working with Colorado Art Ranch to get our guest cottage and Richard's shop ready for the Terraphilia Artist/Writer Residency program beginning later this year.

Working with Art Ranch isn't outside my comfort zone; it's the remodeling and renovation part of the "getting ready." Design of built spaces was Richard's thing. I paid bills, kept him semi-organized, chose colors and dreamed landscaping. I don't have the "object manipulation gene" he and Molly share that allows them to see intuitively how physical objects and buildings work.

Fortunately, I do have knowledgeable family and friends. Our nephew Andrew Cabe, who picked up the woodworking branch of Richard's art meme, is finishing the trim and cabinet work in the guest cottage (and when he's done there, he'll tackle the main house) in trade for several of the big shop machines that won't be needed for the artist residency (a planer, jointer, mortising machine, and a bandsaw). I get a finished house and Andrew gets a start on the woodshop of his dreams. Seems like a good trade.

Cottage

Andrew lives five hours away, works as a seafood-monger, and has two kids. So his time is limited. Still, in three long days last week–with the help of his mom, Bonnie, and a contractor friend, Bob Spencer, he cased and framed all eight doors, plus three windows, and milled and put up all the baseboard in the cottage, including making fancy posts for the bullnose corners. (That's the cottage living room with new trim in the photo above, and one of the baseboard corners below.)

Trimdetail

The bigger project–and scarier to me–is finishing the renovation of Richard's historic brick shop building, built in 1902 as a millwork shop for a long-defunct lumber company. It had been essentially abandoned for several decades before we bought.

Richard spent about ten years (in between building our house next door) getting its structure in good shape, but never finished. Still to come: installing a ceiling (did I mention the building is 1,700 square feet, and the ceiling is two stories high at the center beam of the timber frame?), some rewiring (ditto the above) and repairing the aging plumbing. (That's the shop entrance in the photo below, under the old lumber-drying shed on the side of the building. You can see the front with its high brick gable in the first photo of the post, behind Richard and the sculpture he is securing on a trailer.)

Shopdoor

Before we can even start on the renovation (which will be done mostly by volunteers, and will likely bankrupt my small hoard of shop-repair cash), there's a LOT of cleaning and organizing to do. My love was a pack rat. He collected old industrial metal and gears for sculptures, saved scraps of wood to use for levers and fulcrums and chocks in moving boulders, and seemingly hoarded every piece of paper that came across his desk in the almost-three decades I knew him.

Molly and her sweetie Mark Allen tackled the six four-drawer filing cabinets last fall, hauling 65 pounds of paper to a shredder. That cleared two file cabinets. Then there's his office, and the boxes and boxes of books. I've been going through shelves and drawers and cabinets, all coated with years of dust, sorting out what can be saved from what can be recycled and what is simply trash. That's where the "treasures" of the title come in.

Mariposa
Tucked into every pile and file, whether it's outdated supply catalogs or receipts, are mementos: love notes  I wrote, sketches for sculptures, jottings of favorite quotes, cards from Molly, and in one case, a whole folder of precise pen-and-ink botanical illustrations I sketched for my newspaper columns thirty years ago, and had completely forgotten. (I think he was saving them to frame… someday.)

Rsketch Rcrosssection
The sorting-through is slow work. And hard on my tender heart. When I come to things like the shirt-pocked-sized notebook containing the sketch for a Craftsman-style pergola and bridge he planned to build in our front yard (in the scans above), I dust them off, read them, and then must wipe my tears and blow my nose before continuing on.

I miss my love–his brilliant mind, his soaring creativity, the inborn affection for this numinous Earth that showed in all his work, and most of all, his company. I will always miss him. And now I have a growing stash of poignant–and dusty–treasures to remind me of why I do.