Richard and his dad, Raymond Cabe, outside Salida, winter of 1951

Today, July 16th, 2012, would be Richard’s 62nd birthday. Molly and I decided last winter that we wanted to mark the occasion because while remembering is painful, forgetting his life and the joy he took from it would be worse.

Picking a weekend was easy: his favorite summer event in Salida, the Colorado Brewer’s Rendezvous, where microbreweries from around the state set up tasting casks under the shade trees in Riverside Park a few blocks from our house, was scheduled for Saturday, July 14th. Perfect.

The theme was easy too: it’s a long-standing Cabe-Tweit tradition to combine playing pétanque (a French game of bowling on gravel using steel balls, another of Richard’s summer delights) on our front-yard court with brunch on the morning of the Brewer’s Rendezvous. Once we had the date and the theme, we invited the combined Cabe-Tweit clan plus a few dozen friends, and left the planning and organizing until later.

The day before I left for the river trip, barely 10 days before the petanque brunch, I contemplated preparations. We had always served fritatta, muffins, and fruit salad with homemade yogurt, plus mimosas and an assortment of other beverages ranging from Trippel, Richard’s favorite beer, to coffee and natural sodas. Since it would be just me preparing food for 60 or so guests, I gave myself a break and ordered the fritattas from Ploughboy Local Market, and the muffins from the new bakery downtown. The point was to have a day he would have enjoyed, not to stress over it.

Molly, my brother Bill, great-nephew Connor, Matt, Fiona, Sienna and Porter Bryant (Sienna is Bill’s middle girl), and me in the front row. Thanks to Mark Allen for the photo.

Two days after I shook the sand out of my river shoes, the Tweit clan began arriving. First my middle niece, Sienna, her husband Matt, and their four-year-old, Fiona, and three-year-old, Porter, pulled in from Washington State via stops at Arches National Park and Black Canyon of the Gunnison, among other places. Then Molly and Mark, who flew in from San Francisco; and late that night, my brother and my eldest great-nephew, Connor, also from Washington State, but fresh from a backpacking trip in the San Juan Mountains via the Durango Silverton Narrow Gauge train.

The next day, Friday, we went into serious party preparation, beginning with weeding the petanque court, which for some reason my wildflowers love to colonize. (Clearly, they don’t understand the hazards of play!) Molly, Mark and Bill dug and pulled and raked until the court looked better than it has in years.

The freshly weeded and raked pétanque court, outlined by river rocks and native wildflowers and grasses.

Next we laid in beverages, hauled the 12-foot-long chop saw table from Richard’s studio over to the front porch to hold food, and bought recyclable plates and cups.

Saturday morning we moved the big umbrellas to each end of the court, distributed chairs on the porches and patios, filled the chop-saw table with food and the big galvanized bucket with ice and drinks, arranged mementos at one end of the food table, including a candle made from the remains of the luminarias from the celebration of Richard’s life (thanks to Ed & Paula Berg, and Arlene Shovald) plus an iPad slide show put together by Mark and Molly, and then hung out.

“Aunt Molly, you’re throwing the ball wrong!” Collin Cabe, age five, already knows his great-uncle’s game.

Soon, the porches and yard were full of people eating, drinking, chatting, and either pitching boule or cheering on the pitchers. I flitted about, greeting guests, opening champagne bottles, refilling the coffee carafe, making sure everyone had food and drink, and giving tours of the house and Richard’s studio.

It was a great party, the kind where you look around and realize that people who were strangers a few minutes ago are now talking animatedly, and kids of all ages have gotten into the spirit of play.

By the time a rain shower moved in and the party attendees sheltered under the umbrellas and porches, it was mid-afternoon and time for those who were headed for serious beer-tasting to be on their way, and for the rest of us to clean up.

Some talking, some pitching, all enjoying the kind of gathering Richard loved….

When the house was quiet again, I poured myself a mimosa (my first, if you’re counting) and raised my glass in the direction of the now-quiet pétanque court.

“Happy Birthday, my love,” I said. “You are much missed and well-loved.”

I swear I could feel him smiling.

Mexicanhat Scarletbugler

I had planned on finding time over the holiday weekend to write about the next wave of wildflowers blooming in our yard, but what with having Molly and her boyfriend Mark visiting, plus resuming our annual petanque party to celebrate Richard's birthday (more about that in a moment), I didn't get to the blog. I'll write about our wildflowers in the next post. (That's Mexican hat on the left in the photos above, and scarlet bugler penstemon on the right.)

The big news is that Richard felt good enough to enjoy our annual Fourth-of-July-weekend tradition, when we open our house and yard for an afternoon of fun and friends in celebration of his birthday. (His 61st is actually later this month; we celebrate on the holiday weekend so that Molly and other family can come.)

After Molly and Mark arrived from San Francisco on Friday evening (via Denver and a visit with my Dad), we went into party preparation mode. For Richard, that meant finishing his project of fixing the leaking faucet in our master bath (thanks, Tony, for the last-minute problem-solving!) and "banking rest" by taking extra naps. I worked on readying the house and garden and organizing food and drink, and Molly and Mark helped with food prep and ran errands.

By Sunday noon colorful canvas umbrellas shaded each end of the petanque court, chairs and loungers were arranged in groups on the porches facing the court, and the inlaid steel trestle table we use as a dining table (a Richard design) was on the front porch covered with platters and bowls of artfully-arranged finger-food. Drinks were chilling in an ice-filled galvanized steel tub nearby. (I wish I had shot a photo of the spread, but I was too busy playing hostess.)

Mollyhugging

People began arriving (that's Molly hugging her aunt Bonnie, above, with Richard and his brother, Ron, watching), and pretty soon the porches were filled with groups eating and talking and laughing. Before long, someone broke out the petanque balls, and teams formed, and the action was on.

Petanque

What is petanque? It's a French bowling game played outdoors on earth or pavement. (We think we have the only regulation petanque court in Chaffee County, and perhaps all of south-central Colorado; we know we have the only one with wildflowers for hazards.) Petanque, also called boule, is like bocche ball, but played with steel balls. Each team takes turns "bowling"  toward the cochonet, the small wood target ball. After all the balls have been played, points are measured by how close each team's balls are to the target ball, and then the next round begins. It's fun, anyone can play, and it's a game with a wonderfully leisurely pace perfect for yard parties!

(That's Richard in the photo above, concentrating on the cochonet as he prepares to bowl. The photo is actually from several years ago; I didn't get any shots of the game this year because, well, I was too busy playing hostess…)

Groupshot

People came and went all afternoon, and by the time we gathered under the porch where Richard was resting in a lounge chair to sing "Happy Birthday" and wave the birthday placards created by our friend Sheila, the crowd had thinned from about 60 people to just two dozen. Thanks to those who came to celebrate, to those who sent love and good wishes, and to all who walk with us on this journey with Richard's brain cancer. The wave of love you create is the best kind of infusion, sustaining Richard–and me–through these grueling days. Bless you all!

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Elevatedview

Something else to celebrate: I'll be joining authors Laurie Wagner Buyer, Margaret Coel, WC Jameson, Mara Purl, Joe Stone, Kathy Brandt, and Mario Acevedo for a reading and booksigning at Denver's fabulous Tattered Cover Bookstore tomorrow night, July 6th, at 7:30 p.m to celebrate the new anthology, An Elevated View, Colorado Writers on Writing. (The event is at the Tatt on Colfax Avenue.) There's another event at the Woodland Park (Colorado) Library Thursday night (6:30 p.m.), plus events in Salida and Gunnison (Colorado) in September. If you're in the area, come hear us and pick up a great book!